Tag Archives: Man City

Rivals’ Roundup—well, well, well. Look who’s top of the league…

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All is right in the universe. The Great Chain of Being, after weeks of chaos, decay, and upheavel, has at long last been restored, long may it persevere. Yes, Arsenal are top of the table, and would-be foes such as Tottenham, Man U, and Chelsea are squabbling for the crumbs that we deign to let fall from said table. I am completely and utterly confident that nothing will change the current status quo. When has it ever? Well, enough dithering and throat-clearing. Let’s get to the round-up.

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Saka v. Rodri: The Bout to Knock the Other Guy Out!

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It’s just a bit blurry, but I think I see Rodri fouling Saka there. It might be confirmation bias, though…

In this corner, standing in (just barely) at 87 consecutive Prem matches played despite innumerable uncalled fouls against him, we have Bukayo Saka. In this corner, standing in despite innumerable uncalled fouls to his credit, we have Rodri, who somehow, finally, found a way to get sent off. Only one man can emerge from this fray. Only one club can find a way forward. While it’s possible that Saka might play a role on Sunday, Rodri is ruled out. Apparently, he’s suffered under the delusion that he can get away with anything. Why he’s suffered that delusion is anyone’s guess.

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Rivals’ Roundup—all hail Pep the Destroyer!

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This was a fun image because two of the four aren’t really relevant. Can you guess which ones?

Well, it’s clearly time for all of the rest of us to throw in the towel, for there is nothing standing in the way of Pep’s Man City once again claiming a quadruple. Those of us who had hoped that some degree of lassitude or enervation would somehow steal into his squad may just have to pick up the prayer books. The fat lady ain’t singing just yet, but she’s already rehearsing her scales. D’oh, a deer, indeed. Let’s take a lay of the land.

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Rodri tries to join the “Abuse Arsenal Ankles Army”

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Spain and Man City defensive midfielder Rodri did his level best on Saturday to join the likes of Ryan Shawcross, Dan Smith, and Martin Taylor during Spain’s match against Norway in Euro qualifiers, going in with a reckless, studs-first tackle on Norway and Arsenal midfielder Martin Ødegaard. It was, to be honest—and regular readers will know that I’m averse to hyperbole—disgusting. Ødegaard had planted his right foot and had taken the shot with his left. Rodri, late to close down, slid in from Ødegaard’s right (from his planted foot) and scythed the Norwegian down in a move that reverberated down through the years.

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The Holy Trinity of making Man City drop points…

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I think I’ve hit upon a sacred secret that might just cause Man City’s domestic campaign to unravel or at least fray a bit at the edges just enough to help us win the Prem for the first time in almost twenty years. It’s a secret so decisive, so dastardly, so devastating that I almost feel bad divulging it. Then again, it’s completely out of my control and already deployed, so why not spill the beans? Simply put, the powers that be should make Man City play matches every three or four days. Their history shows that they just can’t handle it. Maybe they’re jaded. Maybe they’re bored. Maybe… I won’t give voice to the third suspicion for fear or jinxing it. Trust me when I say that there’s just enough in this to breathe new life and confidence into our campaign just ahead of the run-in.

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