Is that lady fat enough for you? A screed.


Okay, so she’s not singing just yet, but she’s finished applying her makeup and is ready for her grand entrance. Yes, the fat lady is about to sing, but that’s no excuse for the Chicken Littles to strut and fret their hour upon the stage. There will come a day when they’ll be heard of no more.

From the preseason, no one sane saw us finishing any higher than fifth. Yes, we benefitted from the form of various rivals, which varied from inconsistent to shambolic. However, we’d topped the table for 32 of 35 matchdays, outpacing one of history’s deepest, most-expensive, most-experience, and most-legitimately assembled squads up until a few steps short of the very last gasp.

Did our lads succumb to despair against Brighton? Consider: we needed them to drop nine points from their final four matches​—a massive ask of a squad that is legendary for running the table from January on. Yes, we succumbed to them. We also succumbed to low confidence, to inexperience, to injuries. At either end of the pitch, key players missed one-third of the season. Jesus was just rounding into form; Saliba was already in it. Add in injuries and niggles to Tomiyasu, Smith-Rowe, Partey, and Zinchenko; and fatigue to Saka, Odegaard, White, Gabi, and Martinelli, and what’s left? I just named an XI that would be the envy of perhaps as many as 16 other clubs.

We knew that a lack of depth would be an Achilles’ Heel. We knew that a lack of experience could prove costly. What we didn’t know is that fourteen or fifteen players could stretch Man City’s to the breaking point. They had 16 players log more than 800 minutes; we had 12 do the same. We’ve had four outfield players log more than 3000 minutes; they’ve had none. This was always David versus Goliath, we were always Tantalus as well as Sisyphus; they were always Thanos. They are Scylla and Charybdis.

I’m disappointed, but I draw the line at those who say we bottled it or that we just aren’t good enough. Some have you been insisted that Arteta be sacked, that we’ll never win the Prem, that losing is in our DNA. Bollocks. If that’s your attitude, take a long walk off a short pier. Go support the bland, sterile inevitability that is Man City.

At the other end, I’m not quite ready to except the notion that we should be satisfied with how this season will indubitably turn out. Second place is a massive improvement on where we’ve been for lo these last 15 years or so, but we can’t sweep those years under the rug on the basis of this one. We have wounds to lick and, from what I’ve seen, those wounds will heal and those lads will be stronger, wiser, savvier as a result.

This season was no flash in the pan. If anything, it was a warning-flare, a beacon, a summoning. Our players will see how close they came to achieving the impossible and come back even more-determined, more-seasoned than they were. They’ve come through a crucible and will come out the other side with grit, determination, and hunger, with wisdom, savvy, and guile beyond their years. The same shall be true of Arteta and Edu.

The summer shall draw reinforcements like moths to a flame. It’s not just what we have Champions League football. It’s that, for as good as we’ve been for so much of this season, we’re only going to get better. The Guehis and Caicedos and Vlahovics, the Osimheins and Rices and Zahas, will be drawn towards us, towards this project and this mission.

99% of those who accuse us of bottling it will finish at least a dozen points behind us, proving that one has to first be in a position to bottle before bottling is a possibility. The other 1% have outspent us on transfers, wages, and financial violations to a staggering degree. We’ve shown our vials that a club that recruits and spends carefully can compete with those that spend profligately.

We will rest. We will re-arm. We will re-load. We will use this season and its terminus, which has been both inspiring and disappointing, as a springboard to bigger and better things. That’s no guarantee, of course. Playing in the Champions League group stage will be quite a bit harder than playing in the Europa League group stage, but something tells me that our lads will turn the thin gruel of this season’s end into fine wine of one variety of another.

Chins up, Gooners. This is but a start.

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6 thoughts on “Is that lady fat enough for you? A screed.

  1. consolsbob

    Very good post to fit the circumstances. It certainly focused my mind and cleared out any confusion in my thoughts on replacing a few players.

    The players that are definite keepers for me are: White, Saliba, Gabriel, Zinchenko, Odegarde, Martinelli, Xhaka, Saka, Jesus and Trossard.

    The rest could be sold, any of them. Obviously not all will be.

    Top of my needs list is a better goalkeeper, a left back, a right sided defender, two midfield players and an actual striker.

    1. Jon Shay Post author

      agreed – there might be some sentiment around ESR, but Arteta’s reluctance to use him when others were clearly jaded & fatigued may indicate that something beyond injury or fitness are affecting his status. If we can find more of a role for Tierney, rotating with Zinchenko and perhaps at CB from time to time, I’d take that. Others should be moved- Holding, Elneny, Viera on loan. I think Ramsey is good enough to rely on. The rest, though, I agree.

      In addition to the depth Guardiola has, he can alter tactics and styles through the personnel he has available. We have to play the same XI and the same tactics every week, and that makes us predictable.

  2. jod

    It really doesn’t matter who finishes ahead of who if everybody finishes behind City every season. The Premier League is getting as uncompetitive as the French and German leagues, very depressing. Next season Arsenal will have to balance the champions league with the premier. So if the squad wasn’t strong enough this season it will have to have a lot more depth next time. Hard to strengthen that much without oil money. There’s an assumption the progress under Arteta will just continue. But it doesn’t always happen that way, Spurs under Pochettino had a similar improvement but then seemed to hit a wall. Conversely Leicester got one never to be repeated chance at the title and took it. Really it will be about consistency rather than ability, will the squad be able to perform at the required level twice a week for the whole season ?

    1. Jon Shay Post author

      While City’s dominance of the Prem is similar to PSG’s of Ligue 1 and Bayern’s of the Bundesliga, I don’t think the Prem is as one-dimensional. Liverpool will be back, Newcastle will spend big this summer, Man U look to do the same. The top five or six clubs are all quite strong, and the old saw about any side being any other side is still much truer of the Prem than of these other leagues.

      Your other point is more-salient. We coasted through those Europa League group stages with a lot of rotation, something we can’t do in the Champions League if we expect to progress. Summer investment for both strength & depth will be key.


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