I dreamed we scored four goals tonight—
a brace from Rosicky;
says I to Tom, “you’re not done yet.”
 “I always press,” says he;
“I always press,” says he.

I dreamed Szcz did keep a clean-sheet,
no goals for RvP.
Says I to Szcz, “you’re best in Prem”
 “I won’t concede,” says he;
“I don’t concede,” says he.

These oil barons, they flaunt their wealth;
They ignore what matters most.
Says Arsene “they could never beat
 the superstars I make;
They try to buy instead.”

“Though football’s changed and critics sneered,
the players I have trained
Might be as good tonight as
 when we last won the Prem,
when we last won the Prem.”

 When the Arsenal chants ring out loud
From North Bank and Clock End,
Where Gooners sing and chant their love,
We’ll be atop the Prem.
We’ll be atop the Prem.

I offer apologies to Joe Hill, Phil Ochs, and Billy Bragg, because the original song extols the fight for freedom and civil rights. Then again, Arsenal can claim among its supporters the American singer Steve Earle, who is cut from cloth similar to Bragg and Ochs, so maybe there’s something there. I did actually dream that we scored four against Man U, including a famous brace from Tomáš Rosický, on our way to resounding victory. I awoke with Billy Bragg’s version of the song on my lips and thus was this version born. I won’t recast our clash with Man U as any kind of freedom-fight, and I’ll resist the urge to paint us as the side of nobility and equality fighting against the side of oily greed. Maybe someone can do that in the comments-section.